Methods of Influence
Are you as influential as you could be?
Influence is a complex part of any professional relationship. A variety of related factors come into play as your influence develops. A few examples include trust, judgment, past experience, regard, responsibility, authority, and an emotional attachment to an outcome.
The way we build influence is partially a matter of style. That said, you can be deliberate about how you influence others in your playing field.
You may recognize (and maybe have employed) these four popular influence-inducing methods. Which is the most effective for building long-term influence? Click on your answer.
A. Trust and Mutual Respect Method: Listen with genuine interest. Share experiences, stories of successes and lessons learned along the way. Offer explanations and evidence.
B. Wear 'Em Down Method: Nag, prod, and pester until they give into your request. If all else fails, employ guilt.
C. Parent Method: The standard line is: "Do it because I said so, that's why!" Make sure they know that they won't be happy if they don't follow your lead.
D. Pleasure/Pain Method: Rely on strong enough benefits that you are certain matter to your audience. Likewise, inform them of consequences of not taking some action you are suggesting.
The correct answer is A - but add D to it!
Whether you're a team member, team leader, consultant, or sales professional, you may find yourself using some sophisticated version of any of the four influence-building methods. However, to build long-term, genuine influence and impact, it is crucial to build trust and mutual respect. To do this, open yourself to feedback and questions, set context, and establish credibility by sharing experience.
On to the other answers:
B. Wear 'Em Down Method
Sure, wearing someone down will get the action you want - in the short term. Guilt and resentment in your "victim," though, do not build long-term influence (and if they do, it is not the kind you want).
Hint: Focus your interactions on building buy-in. Give the other party a chance to understand the value of the task you want them to perform. If you have to ask multiple times for the task to be completed, or if you are tempted to pull their guilt trigger, maybe the problem is their lack of context.
C. Parent Method
The heavy-handed exercise of demanding that others perform various tasks "because you say so" gives others the distinct impression that the authoritarian approach is your default. Although it's counterintuitive, condescending others with the Parent Method erodes your credibility. Like the Wear 'Em Down Method, the Parent Method does not build influence in the long view.
Hint: Good parents tell stories to illustrate lessons they want their children to internalize. That same method works well in professional scenarios. When you share your experiences with others whom you wish to influence, they gain a valuable perspective, both about you and your approach to the work at hand.
D. Pleasure/Pain Method
As humans, we really only take any given action if we either receive enough pleasure or avoid pain by doing so. Our actions are mostly based on emotional decisions; then, we tend to use logic or rational to justify our decisions. This method can work well for a while – even without trust and respect. However, if trust and respect do not become part of the equation at some point, it’s likely that what did matter to the audience initially may shift and the old benefits may no longer cut it.
Hint: Coupling this method with the Trust and Mutual Respect and you’ve got the winning formula.
